THIS is England #10 – Craft Beer Hipster-Lite Wanker

Cartoons, Hipster Twats, THIS is England

They’re on the increase! They’re taking over the place! A few years ago they were swilling Fosters and Carling with the rest of the peasants, but now…. now they’re some kind of faux-cool. Now that Topman and every other high street menswear chain is churning out dreadful hipster-style clothes, they’ve jumped on the hipster bandwagon. Even a real original hipster would be preferable to this wannabe loser.

How to be like this dreadful specimen: get a greasy short-back-and-sides. Grow a beard (which everyone hated a few years ago, but, y’know, now they’re so IN). Button your shirt right up to the top (it simply MUST be some sort of check/plaid shirt). Turn up the bottoms of your overly skinny jeans. Perch a ridiculous little woollen hat atop your head. ┬áCONGRATULATIONS, you now fit in! Now go forth and hang around in pretentious bars, drinking shitty ‘craft beers’ which all taste the same (vile), and enjoy the company of the rest of your cretinous kind.

craft 001 copy